Why is it that we all find change so difficult? What is it about change that scares us so much that its easier to stay where we are rather than do something that we KNOW is good for us.
I guess none of us likes the idea of doing something scary, outside of our comfort zone – it makes us feel not quite in control, as if we might not do something perfectly, that we might actually fail – and none of us really likes to think we might fail, especially if someone else is watching! So we carry on eating too much, not exercising, smoking, in a job that makes us unhappy or in an unhealthy relationship rather than take the risk that someone else will judge us or even worse, we will fail to life up to our own expectations.
We all have that little voice in the back of our minds that says “you can’t do that” “I don’t like that it doesn’t feel right, so stop” “who do you think you are thinking that” ” you will fail” “you are useless / fat / stupid etc”. The voice doesn’t intend to be mean, it’s there to protect you, to keep you safe but the negative sound track to your life holds you back, makes you doubt yourself and to doubt what you can do.
But we don’t HAVE to listen to it, we don’t have to accept that what the voice tells us is true all of the time, we can learn to ignore it, to change the way we think, what we believe and by looking for the good or the positive in our lives we can begin to change the emphasis of our inner voice. Do you remember the old Hayley Mills film ‘Pollyana‘? A young girl moves in with her aunt in a small American town full of negativity and you can’t, we don’t, we mustn’t, but her constant reminder to everyone to look for the good slowly wins everyone over until the whole town is changed. Whilst I do think it’s very cheesy it’s still a really warm, uplifting film – the kind you watch on a Sunday afternoon and it leaves you feeling just that little bit happier.
Change is so difficult for many of us and the really big changes like weight loss or fitness or health seem absolutely enormous – so big that we cannot comprehend how on earth we will ever get there. And because the end seems such a long way away and we know it will mean changing our lives, it wont always be easy and sometimes we will get it wrong – sometimes its just easier to give up and not even try.
But we can do it, we can change our lives, our families lives and those of the people around us. If we can learn to embrace positivity, to look for the good in every day and to set small goals along the way we will eventually get to where we want to be. There is no point saying I need to lose 5 or 10 stone the concept seems way too hard to accept but if we say I am going to lose 1 stone by next month that becomes do-able and the confidence we gain from reaching our goals will inspire us to reach further and further along the road.
Change really does begin with a single step and changes to our lives happen a single step at a time. So decide that today is the day you are going to step outside of your comfort zone and change ONE THING, it doesn’t have to be a huge life changing event it can be as simple as today walking to the shop instead driving or being nice to the bus driver or offering to make a drink for your work colleagues.
If you make one small change today and every day in front of you, imagine how full, rich and happy your life could be in a year from now. Make the change; be the change you wish to see.